However
bad you think you are in the kitchen, I can
guarantee that you are not as bad as I was.
I burned everything. Even my dog would sigh
in disgust when I started banging pans about
in the kitchen and friends would suddenly
have to visit their long lost aunt in Timbuctoo
whenever I invited them over for dinner.
It wasn't that I didn't like to eat. I did
and still do, but where I could face down a
raging advertising executive at twenty paces
with no more than a ballpoint pen and a stapler,
put me in front of an oven and my legs turned
to jelly. I'd break out in a cold sweat and
my palms turned clammy. I'd start to hum nervously
and the dog would slink under the bed in case
I tried to force feed him any of my experiments.
On one occasion I tried to rustle up a casual
dinner for some friends who had popped by.
I sweated and banged about, desperate
to get one meal right. My kitchen was open
plan and I turned to see three of my friends
snorting and giggling helplessly. Apparantly
I had been humming Polly Put the Kettle On
in an increasingly high and strained voice.
I gave up cooking for a while much to the
dog's relief and my friends undying gratitiude.
They knew that if they were coming round to
my place for dinner, it would be a Chinese
or Indian Takeaway.
It
was a Thai friend who eventually took pity
on me and introduced me to the novel
idea that it was possible to really enjoy cooking.
She arranged to come by one night and brought
a bag heaving with exotic foodstuff.
As I looked on in horror she laid everything
out
and explained that here were all the ingredients
necessary for a simple three course meal for
four people.
The first dish was this easy
shrimp
soup which is still one of my favourites.
I was pleased with the results that first night,
with Khun Ooi cooking by my side. I was astonished
the second night, when I followed her written
instructons and everything came out right.
There was far to much for me
and my dog, who was for once, quite happy to
share the end
result of my cooking adventures so I gave
a lot of it away to my neighbours. I glowed
with
pride when the lady next door popped by to
ask me for the recipe of that delicious soup.
After
a bit more practise, I plucked up the courage
to invite my three giggly
friends back again. This time I didn't sweat
and I didn't bang about. I knew exactly what
I was doing and my friends were happily surprised
to be able to eat what I put before them that
night.
Though
there wasn't so much giggling that night
there was a lot of laughter and
if I hummed anything at all, I believe it
would have been, Food Glorious Food!
